Thursday, March 31, 2005

 
Reason #327 Why I Love Marty Jannetty

He's dignified, but not too dignified.

-quote-

>>Marty Jannetty made a good showing of himself. He looked about the age he should - healthy, athletic, and dignified (other than the tassels). He wrestled well in the match. It would have been pretty fun, though, if Jannetty blindsided Michaels with a kick so that Angle and Jannetty could laugh and celebrate together on Smackdown later this week. I'll take another Jannetty vs. Michaels feud at house shows over many other feuds WWE is offering.<<

-end quote-

Yeah...not really. A Rockers reunion, if done right, could easily be the most interesting thing the WWE has done in the last three years. A Jannetty/Micheals feud would be dull, seeing as Micheals would walk right over him. There'd be a good match in the process, but we know how it'll end. A Rockers reunion could go anywhere, although it probably won't given the WWE's penchant for not actually going anywhere, but it could.

 
Who Would Have Thought A Bishop Would Somehow Be A Good Judge Of Moral Character?

Latest in Bishop Brom story.

-quote-

>>John McCusker died of drug intoxication, heart failure, asphyxiation and artery blockage, according to the Mono County Medical Examiner's Office, which performed the autopsy. In addition to alcohol, McCusker had medication for high blood pressure, large amounts of the pain killer oxycodone and the stimulant amphetamine, according to the report. He had also used methamphetamine within a week of his death. <<

-end quote-

 
Who Would Have Thought A Bishop Could Somehow Be Able To Judge A Person's Moral Character?

Latest on the Bishop Brom story.

-quote-

>>John McCusker died of drug intoxication, heart failure, asphyxiation and artery blockage, according to the Mono County Medical Examiner's Office, which performed the autopsy. In addition to alcohol, McCusker had medication for high blood pressure, large amounts of the pain killer oxycodone and the stimulant amphetamine, according to the report. He had also used methamphetamine within a week of his death. <<

-end quote-

Monday, March 28, 2005

 
I Want To Apologize....

...for spelling and grammar errors in the post below. It's a very personal and serious post and I think spelling and grammar errors can definitely detract from that sort of writing. But, when I try to edit it, blogger lumps the whole essay into one giant paragraph, which is pretty impractical to re-assemble everytime I want to correct a spelling or grammar error. This apology also applies to any lengthy essays I post in the future.

 
I’ve Had A Vision Of Hell, I Shit You Not

As I’m currently living in a city in which I have no friends, I find myself being reminded of how grateful I am for the friends God has already blessed me with.

My buddy, the Guy That No One Knows, recently made some remarks that I wanted to address.

-quote-

>>I was really looking forward to attending Easter Sunday Service at Calavary Non-Denominational church in Grand Rapids. However, my grandparents are in town and my grandma has more then a few screws loose, so she decided not to go to Easter Sunday Service. Which was the only reason they even were invited up to Hastings. So anyways, becuase my grandma decided not to go I decided to go with my grandpa so he wouldn't have to sit alone in the service.

What a huge huge huge mistake that was.

Easter Sunday is a celebration. It's the day that Christ rose from the grave. It's the day that all those prophecies he made actually came true. It's a great day to be a Christian!! CELEBRATE IT BITCHES!!

……

I thought about how much I read that my friend Chuck looks forward to attending Easter service every year because it means so much to him. I thought that during the first hour of the service. During the second hour, I thought about how I couldn't wait to leave.<<


-end quote-

First off, I relate with your disenfranchisement, this is evident by the fact that I’m not a Baptist anymore (although technically I never was a Baptist, since I was never baptized as one). But, at the same time I’m moved by the fact that you would go to a church you don’t like for the sake of your grandfather. Good stuff, keep it up. I also want to say that I’m rather touched that my own enthusiasm for Easter would inspire you to not want to settle for a sub-par church service.

Next, there’s Randy. I’ve had zillions of conversations with this guy on the subject of religion. And even though he’s currently unaffiliated in that department, I’ve always thought he seemed to be grasping a central principle that most people seem to miss. Which, is probably why he’s so much better at tolerating my indignant rants than the average person. These remarks he made in a recent post seem to sum it up quite well.

-quote-

>>Faith is something I have had in a few things. Mostly people. Sometimes included within "people" is myself, but to be completely self-reliant is like climbing straight up an oiled cable. Sure it's possible..you fill in the rest.

But I won't ever deny how much power faith has, or deny how much it must take to completely devote oneself to something that requires a modicum of it. Sure, that's easy for me to say, and the cynical reader could chalk up me as being dismissive, but here's an example. I don't have to drive on the Nurburgring to know that it would be difficult to race full speed on, but if I was on the tarmac, only then would I know the full scope of what I was in for.<<

-end quote-

Recently, my best friend Caleb has started e-mailing me pictures of his kids. I told him that it made me feel forty. But, forty in a good way. It reminds me of how much I get caught up in my own bullshit. Academics is no one’s ultimate calling. God’s ultimate calling for all dudes is fatherhood (whether it be biological or priestly). Not high salaries, trophy wives, and cushy desk jobs, but smelly, snot-nosed, pain-in-the-ass kids. That’s God’s greatest blessing right there. Which brings me to the final friend I was going to refer to specifically….

I noticed recently that my brother Andrew has a blog, I’m not going to link to it because he’s kind of a private person and I get the impression that he started his blog for the sake of his friends. But, I’m sure as hell going to acknowledge that he recently did a very touching tribute to our father in which he posted this picture (I’ve decided for various reasons not to post this picture, so instead I’ll just describe it. It’s a picture of my dad [wearing an MSU hat] standing next to a four year old Andrew wielding a plastic sword):

“Significant” doesn’t even begin to describe this picture. I remember one time my mom pointed to this picture and told me that that picture was taken during the happiest time in my father’s life. How totally appropriate that the picture that would serve to represent the happiest time in my father’s life would be a picture of him with his youngest son, wielding the sword of supreme valor. Nothing gave my dad more joy than being a father. I mean, he had five kids for fuck’s sake. I like to think that my dad’s penchant for procreation was in some way a foreshadow of his son’s conversion to Catholicism. At the same time, almost one out of every five people in the world is Catholic, so he had five kids, it makes sense that one of them would turn out Catholic (author’s note: actually it’s more like one out of every six people in the world is Catholic, I intentionally changed it).

And it’s on the subject of my father from which I’ve come to this little insight about Hell (I’m sure as hell not going to put Hell in the headline without actually talking about Hell). Easter Sunday makes for some mighty good TV watching, as all the educational channels are talking about religion in some capacity. One of these documentaries, I forget the name, was dealing with the subject of Hell. I’ve found these discussions tedious and I think I’ve figured out why. Christian apologists and theologians have been debating for centuries on what Hell is like. They argue over whether or not there is, in fact, an actual lake of fire in which we’ll burn for all eternity, get eaten by worms, stabbed with pitch forks, etc. etc. The one point they always agree on is that Hell is the hopeless and everlasting separation from God. But, once we’ve established that point, all the other details become excruciatingly arbitrary.

And it’s on this premise that I want to declare that I have, in fact, had a vision of Hell. It wasn’t supernatural, by any means. It needn’t be. I’ve seen Hell in all it’s gruesome agony and so have my siblings Andrew, Cozette, Evette, and Alex. So have millions upon millions of people across the world. Hell is the eternal and hopeless separation from our Heavenly Father, and every time some one loses a father to illness or whatever, they’re receiving their own little mini-revelation of what Hell is.

I’m currently enduring the pain of the temporary separation from my mortal and earthly father. Just imagine how much more painful it must be to endure the everlasting separation from your Eternal and Heavenly Father.

But, the shittyness of Hell doesn’t end there….

Picture how emphatically an infant cries out when his mommy is nowhere in sight. Just imagine how much more emphatically one would cry out when eternally separated from their Heavenly Mother, the Blessed Virgin Mary. Whenever I go home for the weekend I always make sure to do two things. I join my brother at Applebee’s for dollar drafts and I do coffee with my best friend Caleb. If I don’t do these two things, my weekend just isn’t the same. On the same token, Eternity just wouldn’t be the same if I wasn’t in communion with my Eternal Brother and Best Friend, Jesus Christ.

I remember a Baptist minister named Ken Rudolph once told an anecdote about his relationship with his father. His dad was pretty hard-assed and critical. One day he told Ken to go in the backyard and dig a ditch. When he was done digging, the only thing his father said to him was; “How did you get the sides so smooth?”. He said it was as if the heavens had opened and the choirs of angels began singing “Alleluia!!”. This, I’d argue, would constitute an Earthly vision of Heaven. And a damn good one at that.

Heaven is the approval of our Eternal Father, the unconditional nurture of Our Blessed Mother, and Communion with Jesus Christ in the fellowship of the Holy Spirit. Hell is simply the opposite of that, anything else you can add would be arbitrary details. In fact, if there is an actual lake of fire, then it’s a gift, something to distract you from your misery and utter hopelessness.

But, if Hell is bad for us, it’s even worse for God. Yeah, I said it. God experiences the pain of Hell far greater than anyone of us ever will. They always say that the hardest thing anyone could ever go through in their lifetime is the death of a child. So just think of how much more it must hurt the Father when one of his children is handed over to Eternal Death. As kids we love to tattle on our siblings and get them in trouble. But, the parents don’t like that. No parent enjoys sending one of their kids to bed with no desert. As a world population we take pleasure in the idea of Hitler, McVeigh, and bin Laden burning in the lake of fire for all eternity. But, God doesn’t. It breaks His heart every time He has to turn one of His children away from the banquet feast

Our well-meaning yet horribly misguided Muslim friends believe God to be a just and righteous deity who will judge us accordingly. They’re right, but they’re missing the complete picture. God is also a loving father who will use any excuse not to kick us out of the dining hall. He had His only begotten Son brutally murdered, for crying out loud, just so He doesn’t have to turn us away. Just like my dad and my best friend, God loves being a father. He is, after all, the Eternal Father of Jesus Christ (i.e. He was never not a father). But, He loves being a father to Jesus so much that He decided he wanted to have more kids. What kind of idiot do you have to be to have one or two kids and then decide to whip out the birth control pills? That’s not God’s way, and thankfully that wasn’t my dad’s way. Seeing as my brother and I were numbers four and five, I’m very grateful that my dad didn’t fall for the 1.6-2.3 lie that our culture has been force feeding us in the modern era. What if God had two kids and then decided he wanted to focus on His career? Fatherhood is the most important thing in the whole universe. Hell is the absence of Fatherhood.

I know I’ve been talking about my dad a lot lately. As I said before, my past efforts to come to grips with his death were a failure. I’m starting over from the beginning and using the fullness of truth that the Holy Spirit has given me through the Roman Catholic Church to come to grips with his death in a real and meaningful way. So when I finally see him in the afterlife I don’t see my dead father, but an eternal brother in Christ, something much more meaningful. As my father, he’s dead. As my brother in Christ, he has everlasting life. That’s the box spring mattress of how I feel about my dad, now I need to start working on making my bad.

And as for my friends and siblings, I think my feelings towards those guys could best be summed up in these words from the song Warfare; “God bless them Holiness People, the Presbyterians too, them good old shouting Methodists, those praying Baptists too. And when I get to heaven, I want to see you there. And when I say ‘amen’, I want you to say so too”.

 
I Present To You The Very Culture We Live In (This Would Be In Bold Letters, But Blogger Is On The Fritz)

Here’s a conversation I heard right here in the McDonel Hall computer lab about two minutes ago:

Some Australian Guy *yelling to his friend across the computer lab*: Jackie here is the best non-Australian girl I’ve ever had. None of that post sex bullshit.

Jackie: *laughs nervously* It’s just a business transaction as far as I’m concerned.

 
Reason #326 Why I Love Marty Jannetty

As Mr. Tito points out, he's a good wrestler.

-quote-

>>The BIG NEWS OF THE WEEK is former WWF superstar and Rocker Marty Jannetty earning a spot on the WWE roster by simply proving he was a good wrestler, still. He wrestled Kurt Angle to a fantastic match on Smackdown just a day after he had an impressive tag team performance with Shawn Michaels. <<

-end quote-

That's right. Jannetty didn't get hired because he's three hundred pounds or because he's scary looking, hell if I saw him on the street and didn't know who he was I'd probably assume I could kick his ass. But, surely there must be more Jannetty can do than job to new talent.

-quote-

>>Jannetty was most likely hired to help elevate other talent and use his in-ring knowledge to help teach others, given that most Ohio Valley Wrestling guys seem to lack the ability to tell a story in the ring. In addition, I get the feeling that the WWE might make the Rockers reunion a permanent thing since Shawn Michaels doesn't appear to be in the World Title scene any day now. Why not pad the tag team division, I say!<<

-end quote-

Of course! Why didn't I think of this in the first place? Here's a little piece of trivia for the kids; The Rockers never held the WWF Tag Team Championship. They were one of the best tag teams of their era, second only to the Hart Foundation and the British Bulldogs. And they never held the championship. The WWE has a great opportunity to make up for a past injustice and literally re-write history.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

 
Easter

As I sit in an empty house this Easter Sunday contemplating all this most holy holiday implies I'm reminded of another man who, according to law, seemed to have every right to hand his wife over to the forces of death. It was about two thousand years ago. The woman this man was betrothed to was with child, and having never slept with her, he knew the child wasn't his. The obvious conclusion was that she had committed adultery, and he could have handed her over to the right authorities and had her stoned to death and no one in his small community would have had any legal objections whatsoever. The man I'm talking about is of course, St. Joseph, and let me reiterate this point one more time: ACCORDING TO THE LAW HE APPEARED TO HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO HAND HIS WIFE OVER TO THE FORCES OF DEATH.

And he didn't.

While he was still assuming that adultery was afoot, his original intention was to quietly divorce her. No one would have known and Mary would have lived. This is especially wierd, considering that Joseph was as faithful of a Jew as there ever was. Why would he disavow the Law Of Moses in this particular case? Obviously, the Holy Spirit was at work here.

On Easter we celebrate the Resurrection Of Christ. But, why did Christ resurrect? This question obviously has a very long and circuitous answer, but to make it simple and blunt; because death sucks.

This simple and obvious principle is implied in the manner in which Holy Mother Church chooses to venerate St. Joseph. Amongst his many appellations, we acknowledge him as the Patron Saint Of A Happy Death. If there was goodness in death, why would we feel the need to pray to St. Joseph for the purpose of obtaining a happy death?

I've spoken before about how Catholicism has forced me to face certain truths, and if I had known about them before hand I would have never became Catholic to begin with. But thankfully, the Holy Spirit has eased me into these truths, and I imagine there's some more out there that I'm not quite ready to deal with. But, one of those truths I've been forced to face, as of late, may seem kind of obvious: death isn't good.

This is a hard truth for me to face because I thought I had come to grips with my dad's death. I thought I had made it through the grieving process, but I realize now that a large part of what had seemed to get me through the grieving process was my belief that death was somehow good. At my father's funeral, and in the weeks following, well meaning relatives and friends from church would come up to me and tell me how my father had been released from his suffering. Death isn't a release. Death is the ultimate manifestation of mankind's bondage to sin. These same well meaning indivuals would tell me how I was better off without a sick loved one to hold me back. How the fuck was I better off without a father? "Culture Of Death" is such a fitting appellation, because culture blinds people. There are a lot of good hearted people with the best of intentions who just don't know any better. And I was one of them. But, I now find myself forced to face the truth and realize that my grieving process had been based on a lie. I'm forced to start over from square one. This is gonna suck.

Gendo Ikari put it best when he so ominously declared; "Death creates nothing". Sure, he's a cartoon character, but from a Catholic perspective there's a lot of truth to what he says. During every Mass we declare; "Dying You destroyed our death, rising You restored our life". When Christ died He didn't create anything, He destroyed something. He destroyed something very bad. And in His Resurrection He created something glorious.

Death doesn't set us free from suffering. If it did, why would Christ destoy death? I'm glad my father isn't suffering anymore. But, his death wasn't a good thing, for anybody. It was the final and ultimate shitty event in a series of shitty events. But, death has done everything it can do to my father, now Christ has the final say. Christ's kingdom is that of eternal life. Death is the kingdom of Satan. And I heard the voice of Jesus say; "Satan, your kingdom must come down".

 
Ecumenical What Nots Are Good And All

But, I've got to put my foot down and acknowledge that it's far better to attend a Roman Catholic Church than one them there "Mega-Churches". And I'll be damned if this picture doesn't say it all.

Of course, the dancing Santas are no sight to behold either.


 
Reason #325 Why I Love Marty Jannetty

He's money.

-quote-

>>Now, word is spreading that Jannetty will end up on the Raw brand for a series of "Rockers Reunion" matches with partner Shawn Michaels on house shows following Wrestlemania. It has been said many times that WWE needs to put something unique on the live events if they want fans to come out and buy tickets, and this certainly qualifies as a unique event. <<

-end quote-

No shit. In my twelve years as a wrestling fan if at any point there had been on opportunity to see the Rockers live, there's no quantity of money I wouldn't have forked over. It's just too bad Raw just hit up West Michigan and probably won't be coming around any time during the Rockers' quasi-reunion.

 
How Dare You Disregard My Internal Forum

The Rainbow Sashers weigh in on Bishop Brom and, of course, contribute nothing of remote intelligence.

-quote-

>>Briefly this paragraph says that through conscience we discover "a law inscribed by God" in the human heart, the law by which we will be judged. Conscience makes known to us the twofold law of love of God and neighbor. This "law" is a voice telling us what to do, here and now. On the other hand, it says that conscience is a person's "secret core," the "sanctuary" where we are "alone with God whose voice echoes" in our hearts. The Rainbow Sash Movement felt the Bishop's original decision attacked John McCusker, his life partner, his family and friends. We felt this was an act of judgment on the Bishop's part, with total disregard for John's internal forum. <<

-end quote-

All together now: UGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

-quote-

>>The RSM now stands with Bishop Brom's current pastoral position of apologizing to the McCusker family, which includes John himself, and his life partner.<<

-end quote-

No, it doesn't.

-quote-

>>When Dogma lacks any love or Charity, it becomes a falsehood.<<

-end quote-

No, it doesn't.

-quote-

>>If it is the family's wishes to have a closed funeral Mass, the Bishop should honor that. <<

-end quote-

Since when are Bishops supposed to take orders from the laity?

Saturday, March 26, 2005

 
Why So Quiet?

Some of you may have found it kind of odd that as a Catholic blogger who's regularly commenting on various Catholic going-ons, I've been talking more about Marty Jannetty's recent return to the ring than the whole Schiavo thing. The reason is that the Schiavo scenario strikes painfully close to home. My father died from having refused a feeding tube. Now the Schiavo situation and my dad's have nothing in common except for the words "feeding tube". My dad was actually dying, he had a fatal disease that was getting worse by the day and all a tube would have done was make his final days a lot more painful. And he, himself, refused the tube.

Tube removal is a case to case scenario, in Schiavo's case it's absolutely wrong, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. In my father's case, a tube would have increased his suffering whilst lengthening his life in no significant way. There's no similarity whatsoever, I get that. However, loved ones trying to win me over to their side by making comparisons betwixt Schiavo and my father has put me in an incredibly sour mood during a time of year when I'm usually feeling really good.

Today is the two year anniversary of my entry into the Roman Catholic Church. In about a half hour I'll be leaving for the Easter Vigil Mass, the holiest Mass of the year. On top of that, it carries incredible significance for me, for obvious reasons. Plus, there's nothing more exciting than seeing the new converts getting baptized and confirmed into the Church. And it's just flat out the most awe-inspiring Mass of the whole year.

I don't want to talk about Schiavo because it hurts to even think about it. I see footage of her on TV and it reminds me of how frail and miserable my father was during his last days. It reminds
me of how frail my Holy Father currently is. This is the anniversary of my entry into the Catholic Church and my Holy Father is stuck at home watching Mass on TV, just as my father was stuck in bed watching TV during all the important moments in my life. This is what's going through my head right now, during a time of year when I'm usually at my chipperest.

Anyways, gotta get going. If any fellow Catholics happen to read this before heading off to Mass, do me a favor, pray for the well being of Terri Schiavo and our Holy Father, pray for the soul of my father, and pray for those who are preparing for baptism and/or confirmation (I know from experience that that can be an extremely nerve-wracking position to be in).

Also, if anyone has noticed, my blog has definitely taken a turn towards the more impersonal over the last six months. Since I've moved to East Lansing I don't have a computer at my place. I do all my blogging from the McDonel Hall computer lab. It's hard to write a decent, lengthy, reflective essay under those circumstances, so......Marty Jannetty's comeback it is.

 
A Molded Jesus, For Example, Would Not Be A Good Call

I'm not sure what to think about this.

 
Wrestlers No One Cares About Discussing Matches No One Cares About

Koko B. Ware weighs in on Triple H vs. Batista.

-quote-

>>Batista, you know, is real hot right now. All the fans are behind him and if he loses, no one will look at him the same.<<

-end quote-

Sure, he's speaking in kayfabe here, but there's still a lot of reality behind what he's saying. Orton turned face and was squashed by Triple H a month later, his character has become so damaged that he's currently getting a complete overhaul, turning heel and changing rosters. If Batista loses it'll be the exact same scenario.

Friday, March 25, 2005

 
More On Bishop Brom And More Sarcasm

Evangelical Christians who lead crusades against homosexuality are sensible.

-quote-

>>The morning after San Diego's Roman Catholic bishop apologized to a family after canceling their gay son's funeral Mass, he left two voicemail messages for a evangelical Christian activist who crusades against homosexuality.

"James, please take my call," Bishop Robert Brom said Tuesday into the answering machine of James Hartline, a Hillcrest man who supported canceling the funeral. "I have to explain how it's all wrong and how I was done in. We need to talk and we need to meet. Please call me back immediately."

In a second message, the bishop sounded more urgent: "This is Bishop Brom begging you to call me back. I did not cave in. I stood for our position and I still do, but I need to explain and I need your help."

Hartline said he never returned Brom's calls. Instead, he played the messages for a reporter, saying he was outraged by the bishop's "totally spineless" apology to the family of John McCusker, a nightclub owner who died earlier this month. <<

-end quote-

So if one of your brothers in Christ doesn't seem to share your same zeal for a particular cause, instead of hearing them out you go to the press and insult them. Nice.

 
Marty Jannetty

So why would the WWE sign a till recently relatively obscure, once notable superstar?

-quote-

>>The veteran Marty Jannetty has mainly been hired by WWE to work with some of the younger talent in the company.<<

-end quote-

Translation: They wanted a "seasoned veteran" to put over the younger talent. So sad.

A steady paycheck is a steady paycheck, so of course Jannetty seems fine with the fact that he's been brought in to be the newest jobber.

-quote-

>>“I’m going to give him a battle he won’t forget,” he promises. “And, if nothing else, I’ll wear him down a little bit for my partner!”<<

-end quote-

Yeah, that's the spirit. If you don't beat him, maybe you'll hurt him a little. Is it any surprise this guy could never hold the Intercontinental Title for longer than two days?

 
Sumo Traditionalists Defend Pantslessness

Full story.

-quote-

>>Sumo's amateur association hit upon the idea of allowing shy youngsters to wear "sumo pants," a more substantial garment similar to cycling shorts, to try to boost the dwindling numbers of children taking up the sport, the daily Yomiuri Shimbun said on Thursday. <<

-end quote-

Shy sumo wrestlers? Sumo wrestling isn't the kind of sport you go into if you're a timid feller.

 
Cornbeer Communion

Indigenous people are sooooo spiritual.

-quote-

>>In the rugged valleys of the Sierra Madre in the Mexican state of Chihuahua, the Tarahumara Indians observe Holy Week unlike any other Christians on the globe. <<

-end quote-

They should rephrase that; "The Tarahumara Indians observe Holy Week unlike Christians".

-quote-

>>"God taught the Raramuri how to make corn beer," says Guadalupe Espino Palma, the traditional governor of the Norogachi district. "We make offerings of tesguino to God himself, and He drinks it also. We use tesguino for dancing, and we enjoy drinking it." Even getting drunk is a spiritual act, he explains.<<

-end quote-

Yeah, that makes sense.

-quote-

>>Bill Merrill, a Smithsonian Institution anthropologist who's spent 30 years studying and working with the Tarahumara, says the tesguino chases out the "large souls" within, leaving only the "little souls." "And so when people get drunk that's why they act like children," he says. "Because the souls that are controlling their actions are the little souls, like little children."<<

-end quote-

I wish this guy was atypical, but your average anthropologist does in fact get so stupified by social theorey models and cultural relativism that they completely forget basic shit like how alcohol works.

 
To Any Nazarene Jews Who Might Be Reading This

Bite me!

-quote-

>>Richardson explains that dating based on the moon was a nod toward the Jewish celebration of Passover, which was also determined by the moon. <<

-end quote-

 
New Match Announced For Wrestlemania

The Pope vs. a mystery opponent.


In all seriousness, who the hell was playing with Photoshop and thought this picture was a good idea?

Either way, here's where I found the picture and learned a new word.

-quote-

>>The obviously failing health of Pope John Paul II has given new impetus to the Vatican press corps' favorite pre-occupation, compiling lists of "papabile."

The word can't be found in any Italian dictionary, but it translates literally as "popeable," and refers to cardinals who are considered possible candidates for the job of next pope. <<

-end quote-

Thursday, March 24, 2005

 
The Warrior Refuses Induction Into The WWE Hall Of Fame Out Of Respect For His Fans. Wait, He Still Has Fans?

The Ultimate Warrior; indignant and crazy to the point that it's not funny anymore.

-quote-

>>My own legacy, as the creator and performer of Ultimate Warrior, is to the people who have stood by me and drawn strength and inspiration from the integrity of my word. That my word is my bond and there is value in my promises.

......

It would do nothing more than denigrate his memory. A memory that, it’s funny, yet so true, will outlast every other one that has ever stepped into a wrestling ring.<<

-end quote-

 
Go Figure

Turns out Catholics are split right down the middle on the death penalty.

I myself am very much opposed to the death penalty, but I tend to sympathize with those who aren't. I just can't see how something that was required by God in the Old Covenant would by intrinsically evil in the New Covenant. Obviously, the New Covenant frees us from the burden of the law, and being called to respect life, an opposition to the death penalty seems like the most logical conclusion. I'm just saying that while I don't agree with people who support it, by any means, I would hardly condemn it as intrinsically evil. And neither does the Church:

-quote-

>>McCarrick was asked how the church might enforce its death penalty stand in light of some bishops' threats last year to excommunicate politicians who favor abortion rights.

The cardinal said the issues are different because "there's no wiggle room in the area of life where you have the innocent baby in the mother's womb," and opposition to abortion was "always the teaching of the church," whereas the church's shift against most uses of the death penalty is more recent. <<

-end quote-

No one's going to be denied Holy Communion for supporting the death penalty, and that seems about right.

 
Wait....What....

Run that by me one more time...Huh..Why Am I just learning this now?

-quote-

>>But it was what the Rock did after filming that showed his true strength. From talk shows to news conferences, the Rock discussed his "Be Cool" role with affection and sincerity, recalling a gay wrestling mentor named Pat Patterson. <<

-end quote-

 
Shannon Moore Car Accident

Link.

-quote-

>>It amazes me that WWE hasn't even reported this on their website so fans could send their well wishes to Moore:<<

-end quote-

Of course they haven't, he's under 225.


 
Reason #324 Why I Love Marty Janetty

He's mysterious.

-quote-

>>Some reports have Marty Jannetty at 43 years old, but other sources have him at age 46.<<

-end quote-

 
A Lesson To All You Bishops Out There

Don't do anything ever.

As I see it, it was perfectly reasonable for him to refuse to do the funeral. It was sensible of him to apologize to the family for any grief his descision may have caused them, without apologizing for the descision in and of itself. And it was very nice of him to offer to dedicate a Mass to him. So of course everyone's going to be pissed.

 
Just In Case You're Only 99.9% Sure You're Going To Hell

There's always this.

 
Giving Up March Madness For Lent

I can't even begin to comprehend this kind of piety. My first time observing Lent I intended to give up beer, until I realized that Wrestlemania usually falls somewhere in Lent. I don't even have the discipline to not drink beer during my favorite sporting event, let alone not watch it at all.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

 
Nicole Kidman Begins Studying Old Testament....

....and is turned into scatterbrained moron.

-quote-

>>I'd love to go on an archaeological dig.

.....

And I'd like to get my degree in philosophy.

.....

I still haven't swum with the great whites, and I really want to do that.

.....

I'd love to be a writer, a novelist. I like the solitude.

.....

I like tennis players!<<

-end quote-

 
The Thing I Love About The Catholic Church

They put the priests with badass beards at the front of the line. You clean shaven priests, well, you're just going to have to wait.

 
I'm So Surprised

Apparently editing out seven minutes of violence hasn't diminished the overall intensity and squeamishness of The Passion. It's a good thing I assumed that from the beginning, before I took a bunch of easily nauseated epileptic five-year-olds to see it.

 
Here Comes Sarcasm....

Episcopalians rock at metaphors!!

-quote-

>>In the sermon I was talking about St. Patrick and the Irish tradition of monks pushing off in small leather-covered boats and letting the waves and winds take them somewhere; they would assume where they arrived was where God wanted them to be. So I was saying that the Holy Spirit often takes us to places we don't expect, and if we don’t push off we never know where the spirit might be taking us.

......

Why is it that we can expand our consciousness in every area other than sexuality, but when we come to sexuality everything has to be fully revealed and contained in scripture by one particular reading? <<

-end quote-

Here I was thinking that if I changed the channel during a gratuitous sex scene or avoided a titty bar, it was because I didn't want to put my self in a situation where I could be tempted to commit grave sin. Now I realize I was just leaving my boat docked instead of letting the spirit guide it.

OH! And one more thing...

-quote-

>>I look at the ordination of women in the Episcopal tradition; that was a break if you looked at it in terms of the past, but if you accept truth as organic and ongoing then you can say, “This is an enlargement of our understanding of ministry rather than a hideous break with what has been.”<<

-end quote-

No....it's a hideous break.

 
Another Person Reiterates The Argument That The Solution To The Priest Shortage Is Lowering The Standards

Only this time it's a Bishop.

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

 
Science

The God Gene.

-quote-

>>The debate about the "God gene" was prompted last year by Dr Dean Hamer, the director of the Gene Structure and Regulation Unit at the National Institute in America. After comparing more than 2,000 DNA samples, he concluded that the greater people's ability to believe in a higher spiritual force, the more likely that they would share the gene, VMAT2.<<

-end quote-

VMAT2: The God Gene? Folks, this is only taking us one place....

Yep....we're fucked.

So if scientists can isolate a God gene and allow parents to choose the sex of their baby, does that mean parents can choose to have a daughter that isn't a slut or a son that won't pull the plug on them when they're seventy? I suppose atheists could choose to have kids that are completely incapable of ever having any religious beliefs, I can't imagine that would be the least bit unethical.

 
Science

The God Gene.

-quote-

>>The debate about the "God gene" was prompted last year by Dr Dean Hamer, the director of the Gene Structure and Regulation Unit at the National Institute in America. After comparing more than 2,000 DNA samples, he concluded that the greater people's ability to believe in a higher spiritual force, the more likely that they would share the gene, VMAT2.<<

-end quote-

VMAT2: The God Gene? You know where that's taking us....
http://www.juzzam.com/EoEpix/Rei&theDead.JPG>
Yep....we're fucked.

But, if scientists can isolate a God gene and allow parents to choose the sex of their baby, does that mean parents will one day be able to choose to have a daughter that isn't a slut or son that won't pull the plug on them when they're seventy? I suppose atheists could make sure they have children who are completely incapable of having any religious beliefs ever, I can't imagine that being the least bit unethical.

 
Science

The God Gene.

-quote-

>>The debate about the "God gene" was prompted last year by Dr Dean Hamer, the director of the Gene Structure and Regulation Unit at the National Institute in America. After comparing more than 2,000 DNA samples, he concluded that the greater people's ability to believe in a higher spiritual force, the more likely that they would share the gene, VMAT2.<<

-end quote-

VMAT2: The God Gene? You know where that's taking us....
http://www.juzzam.com/EoEpix/Rei&theDead.JPG>
Yep....we're fucked.

But, if scientists can isolate a God gene and allow parents to choose the sex of their baby, does that mean parents will one day be able to choose to have a daughter that isn't a slut or son that won't pull the plug on them when they're seventy? I suppose atheists could make sure they have children who are completely incapable of having any religious beliefs ever, I can't imagine that being the least bit unethical.

 
Science

The God Gene.

-quote-

>>The debate about the "God gene" was prompted last year by Dr Dean Hamer, the director of the Gene Structure and Regulation Unit at the National Institute in America. After comparing more than 2,000 DNA samples, he concluded that the greater people's ability to believe in a higher spiritual force, the more likely that they would share the gene, VMAT2.<<

-end quote-

VMAT2: The God Gene? You know where that's taking us....
http://www.juzzam.com/EoEpix/Rei&theDead.JPG>
Yep....we're fucked.

But, if scientists can isolate a God gene and allow parents to choose the sex of their baby, does that mean parents will one day be able to choose to have a daughter that isn't a slut or son that won't pull the plug on them when they're seventy? I suppose atheists could make sure they have children who are completely incapable of having any religious beliefs ever, I can't imagine that being the least bit unethical.

 
Science

The God Gene.

-quote-

>>The debate about the "God gene" was prompted last year by Dr Dean Hamer, the director of the Gene Structure and Regulation Unit at the National Institute in America. After comparing more than 2,000 DNA samples, he concluded that the greater people's ability to believe in a higher spiritual force, the more likely that they would share the gene, VMAT2.<<

-end quote-

VMAT2: The God Gene? You know where that's taking us....
http://www.juzzam.com/EoEpix/Rei&theDead.JPG>
Yep....we're fucked.

But, if scientists can isolate a God gene and allow parents to choose the sex of their baby, does that mean parents will one day be able to choose to have a daughter that isn't a slut or son that won't pull the plug on them when they're seventy? I suppose atheists could make sure they have children who are completely incapable of having any religious beliefs ever, I can't imagine that being the least bit unethical.

Monday, March 21, 2005

 
I Didn't Even Read This Editorail

I just wanted to point it out because this headline is the sort of thing that inspires people to bash bricks against their heads.

 
These Dudes' Names Are Shannon And Loran!!

Oh yeah, and they're assholes.

-quote-

>>Central Church of God explained its decision in a letter March 1 from minister of evangelism Shannon Burton to Loaves & Fishes in Charlotte: "As a Christian church, we feel it is our responsibility to follow closely the (principles) and commands of Scripture. To do this best, we feel we should abstain from any ministry that partners with or promotes Catholicism, or for that matter, any other denomination promoting a works-based salvation."<<

-end quote-

You'd think that if works played no role in salvation whatsoever, then God wouldn't care if you gave donations to a charity that also accepts donations from Catholics.

But they've issued an apology, because aparently publicly defacing your brothers in Christ makes you look like you're "better than everybody else".

 
In Soviet Russia, Religion Practices You

Russians can't commit blasphemy quite like us Americans, but bless them they're trying.

 
Back When I Was In School

No one gave a shit over whether or not I was entertained. And that's the way it should be.

-quote-

>>God is being edited out of religious education lessons in schools for fear that His presence might bore children.

A study at Exeter University found that biblical accounts of the Good Samaritan, David and Goliath and Joseph were taught as ethical stories, with no reference to God, in increasingly secular classes on religion.

Teachers said that they were reluctant to introduce theology because they did not believe in God or feared that constant references to Him would put off children or be seen as indoctrination.<<

-end quote-

On top of that, schools are now training a generation of retards who don't know how to read scripture.

-quote-

>>One 14-year-old who chose the "feeding of the 5,000" said its message was "don't take things for granted and share things".

Another said that the story of David and Goliath meant that "even when the odds are stacked against you, you can still come out on top", while a 15-year-old girl said that the Nativity signified "that the birth of a newborn baby is the best gift of all".<<

-end quote-

 
Science

It starts with choosing your baby's sex. Next thing you know.....

Yep...we're fucked.

Sunday, March 20, 2005

 
Black Catholics Mourn The Loss Of Segregation

Am I missing something here? A Catholic parish is built, during segregation years, exclusively for black people. Sixty four years later the bishop decides that the parish should merge with another local parish, one that's multi-racial. Black Catholics worshippping along side their white, Asian, and Latino brothers in Christ? This is bad? Maybe there's a couple of pages stuck to gether on my copy of the Catechism, because this isn't making any sense.

 
You Got Me On That One

The folks at Yale expose the misconceptions put forth by the well-intended-but-oh-so-misguided abstinence movement.

-quote-

>>They found that many pledgers who claimed to be virgins were having premarital sexual contact. Although a large number of adolescents avoided vaginal intercourse, they were more likely to have oral and anal sex without the use of condoms.

The study was done by a team at Yale and Columbia University. The Results of the study were published in Journal of Adolescent Health.

The reults surely debunk the theory being pushed by the abstinence movement in the U.S.<<

-end quote-

What with the abstinence movement's aberrant pro-anal stance.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

 
The Chinese Know Shit About Chinese Cinema

Hong Kong Film Awards' names the one hundred best Chinese movies, and they couldn't be more wrong. Not only is The Magnificent Butcher not number one, it's not even on the list. The list does have a few redemptive moments, like Drunken Master at thirty three and Eight Diagram Pole Fighter at ninety eight.

But, for those of you who don't know as much about Chinese cinema as I do, here's a comprehensive summary of the last one hundred years of Chinese cinema.

1905-1978: A bunch of movies are made, all but three starring Kwan Tak Hing
1979: Yuen Woo Ping and Sammo Hung join forces to make The Magnificent Butcher, hands down the greatest kung fu movie ever made. The movie is so kick ass that the two don't ever work together again. There's no point.
1980-2005: A bunch of movies are made.

Now don't get me wrong, Chinese cinema has afforded us hundreds of killer movies. But, all you need to know is The Magnificent Butcher. Whenever I'm looking at a kung fu movie, the first question I ask is "was anyone in this movie involved with The Magnificent Butcher?". If so, I buy the movie. It's just that simple, and I'm constantly entertained. The movie is so awesome, that even stills get me pumped the fuck up.

They're fighting with paint brushes! It's so fucking badass, if you haven't seen this movie...well, what are you doing, stop reading this blog and go watch this fucking movie.

 
Baha'i = Assinine Religion

This editorial reminded me of why I never bothered to read up on the Baha'i faith.

-quote-

>>The Bible says that Jesus of Nazareth was a sperm descendant of King David through his father Joseph. This is why he was called Christ. The word Christ comes from the Greek Christos, which is a translation of the Hebrew Messiah or, more completely Messiah-ben-David. The word Christ means an anointed male sperm descendent of King David.

....

The current crises in the world today, which are prophesied extensively, are no laughing matter! The return of Jesus, who appeared in the prophesied seven-towered Temple of Ezekiel in Deer Lodge, Mont., warned the people of impending catastrophe should the world continue on its current course.<<

-end quote-

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

 
Muhammad Ali's Daughter Isn't Horribly Bright

Celebrity with no religion attempts to talk about religion, and guess what? It's incoherent drivel!

-quote-

>>My father is very spiritual—more spiritual now than he is religious. It was important for him to be very religious and take the stands he did in earlier years. It was a different time. He still tries to convert people to Islam, but it’s not the same.<<

-end quote-

Wait. Islam changed after the 60s? The entire religion?

-quote-

>>It’s not that I’m not Muslim, but that I can’t call myself a practicing Muslim. I wasn’t raised going to the mosque after my parents got divorced. I read the Qur’an a lot. But I also believe all religions are true. If I had to choose one religion that most expressed what I believe, it would be Islam. <<

-end quote-

Now this quote only seems incoherent because I've only studied pre-1960s Islam. I don't know anything about the current version. Apparently it's "not the same".

 
This Is Not The Jim Caviezel We've Come To Know And Love

Of course he's not going to say he hates it, but still...

-quote-

>>"It's less violent, but it's still just as powerful. I think, like with Alfred Hitchcock, what you don't see doesn't necessarily mean that it's any less violent," Caviezel says. "The mind makes the imagination. It's what you don't see a lot of times which is terrifying as well."<<

-end quote-

Yeah well, I can not see the violence at home for free.

 
People Actually Wasted Their Time Doing Studies On "Passion" Motivated Hate Crimes?

Ughh.

-quote-

>>A poll released by the Pew Research Center in Washington almost exactly a year ago provided the first statistical suggestion that the film's box-office success might be associated with an increase in anti-Jewish feeling.

The B'nai Brith study published this weeks states; "Whereas only nine incidents in 2003 had religious connotations to the story of Jesus' death, there were 32 such incidents in 2004, nine of them in February when the movie opened and a further 15 in the three months following its release,"

In a statement, B'nai Brith Canada vp Frank Dimant said incidents of anti-Semitism last year reached an all-time high and were becoming more violent.<<

-end quote-

I'm a huge stinking pile of not the least bit convinced.

 
Good News For Me

Looks like the Baptist upbring is going to wear off eventually!

-quote-

>>Genes may help determine how religious a person is, suggests a new study of US twins. And the effects of a religious upbringing may fade with time.

......

McGue says the new work suggests that being raised in a religious household may affect a person's long-term psychological state less than previously thought. <<

-end quote-

 
Now I've Seen Everything

A pro-life female minister?!?!? WAHHH?? *rubs eyes*

Sunday, March 13, 2005

 
These Kids Aren't Horribly Bright

Italian director plans blasphemous passion play.

-quote-

>>Mr Sorbara remained unmoved by what he called the "dictates of people with a different vision of Christ. The Bible says, 'In Christ, there is no male or female' ," he said.<<

-end quote-

Of all the idiotic...

-quote-

>>Mr Sorbara, who describes himself as a fervent Catholic, said that he had not meant his casting to be provocative, but had merely been following the scriptures.

"The dignity of the woman is the purposeful expression of God which she has inherited from her creator," he said. "Bible experts and even the Pope are on my side."<<

-end quote-

The Pope, eh? And check this out, the chick playing Jesus is just as smart.

-quote-

>>Christ on the Cross represents all of humanity. This seems obvious to me, even if I am not a believer myself. What is heartening is the young people's enthusiasm for this new interpretation. As a result some have even begun reading the scriptures.<<

-end quote-

I wonder if when these kids start reading the scriptures they notice the part where Jesus is a dude.